As my semi-yearly exams are coming up this month, I don't get to write much. What I write is purely the few crumbs my creativity is throwing my way. There will be no regular updates on either of my fan fictions, I'm glad to get anything done at all.
Dragon Age: Inquisition is a roleplaying epic fantasy game, the latest in the fantastic Dragon Age series by BioWare. One of the many great features of this game is the ability to romance certain characters; in this case, there are eight possible romantic relationships you can pursue, although these depend on your own character's gender and race. One of the methods of unlocking the Duelist specialization in Dragon Age: Origins is for the Warden to play and beat the pirate captain Isabela at Wicked Grace. In Dragon Age: Inquisition, Varric will invite the Inquisitor to a game of Wicked Grace with some of their companions and advisors. References Edit. Dragon Age Inquisition: Siding with Templars - Part 3 “Save the Templars and Break the Barrier”.
This particular project is somewhat special. As I get to play a role in it. Yeah, yeah, self insertion stories are boring, yada yada yada. Nobody is keeping you here. Although it might be fun to see how someone fucks up canon… royally… on purpose… So yeah. Oh, and the character is only loosely based on me. No need for pity.
Chapter One: Departure..
The soft moonlight let her white skin shimmer like alabaster, making her look even more beautiful. I barely dared to let my finger explore what was laid out so delicately before me. When I started tracing her perfect curves, I was rewarded with a soft moan. It was a promising first step, which was much more than I could have hoped for, considering I was barely of legal age.
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Which doesn't say much nowadays, but to be barely of legal age and still be a virgin, that was something worth mentioning. Not that I would go around boasting about this fact, but given what was about to happen, it sets things into the right perspective, I think.
At least the virgin part changes tonight, I thought with a tiny smirk hidden in the dark.
I raised my gaze from where my hands rested to take in her face. This brunette… goddess… looked at me with an encouraging smile. A mellow warmth engulfed me. I still couldn't believe that she had said yes, but even if you ignored the white dress that was hanging in the closet, the beautiful woman on my bed dismissed any doubts immediately.
Did I mentioned that I was raised very traditionally? Some might say old-fashioned, but I was living proof that even an old-fashioned gentleman with definitely more inner values than outer values could end up with a solid ten. I even escaped the freaking friend zone! And I was damn proud of it. That was no small feat and was widely regarded as one of the most heroic deeds among all my nerd friends.
Yeah. I was a nerd. I had a stocky body. I was the IT guy who was too good-hearted to not repair all the computers for his friends for free. My glasses were as thick as window panes. The list could go on and on. And yet, here I was in bed with my beautiful newly wed wife. I wonder if there ever was a more fitting occasion for a mental high five or fist pump… doubtful.
After what felt like seconds we both found our release, together.
'Oh god, I'm coming!' I grunted and the scene froze on the spot.
'Oh, the irony!' said a chuckling voice, from his position in the shadows.
I almost jumped through the ceiling. 'What the fuck!' I pushed her off me and tried hastily to cover myself and Alison with the blankets around us. See was just as frozen as everything around us.
The intruder emerged from the corner and switched on the light. The light blinded me for a second but it lasted only mere seconds. As my eyes had adjusted to the new brightness, I could discern a man in a white nightgown and bare feet. His grey hair flowed freely around his shoulders and his face had the complexion of an old man. Online casino game strategy. Surely the beard helped, but still.
'You know, you saying that, and it really happens. Both literally and figuratively… 'God, I'm coming'? No? Too soon?'
'Wha… wait, who are you? What the fuck are you doing in our bedroom?'
'Well, I am God. And you two are dead.'
What the…
'Get lost, perv! Go stalk someone else or you'll be sorry' I yelled angrily.
He only shook his head and smiled. 'Tsk, tsk. You shouldn't swear so much, not with your upbringing. But I understand your scepticism. I rarely interact with my creations anymore, and never in my true form. So, to lessen your doubts, as a sign of good faith, so to speak, I will give you prove. Look at your hand.' My eyes did a nice roll at the bad pun but threatened to pop out of their sockets as I suddenly could count six fingers on my hand.
'Since that movie this usually does the trick. Will you listen now?'
I could only nod still in shock.
'To get the usual stuff off my chest, yes, you really are dead… for now. Yes, your wife is dead, too. You died of an undetected cerebral aneurism, as did she. What are the odds, right? No, you don't go to hell… because there is no real hell, but still. I am here because I have chosen you to be my champion.'
'What? Rewind, play again slowly. Explain.'
'You're both dead. Finito. And I have a… business offer for you.'
I narrowed my eyes. 'What do you mean, 'business offer'?'
'Well, my good old archenemy the devil had this crazy idea that the butterfly effect is nuts. So I was like, no way, and he was like, yes way, and so we got into this ridiculous argument. And now we need to settle the fight the old-fashioned way. I choose a champion, we see if he comes out on top or not, and the loser pays up. Normally, our bets don't leave this realm, but I'm afraid that's not possible in this case. The consequences could be catastrophic, so we put the show elsewhere.'
'Do I have a choice?'
God only shrugged. 'Of course. All my creations have choices.'
I eyed him suspiciously. 'You sound as if you're leaving out a lot.'
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He rolled his eyes. 'God, why are humans so perceptive? Your choice is where it will happen. Your participation, however, is non-negotiable.'
God was nothing like I imagined. Well, except the appearance. He was… very different from what the church said. There was still more to this, I could feel it, so I made eye contact and sent a deep, angry stare down his eyeballs. 'Where's the poop, God?'
God actually squirmed. Under my stare. I felt good. Thanks, Lily. 'I may or may not had to sell your wife to the devil to change the rules for this game?'
'You did what?' I roared. I didn't feel so good anymore.
'Calm down, kid. It's not like you would've kept her anyway. You're both dead, remember? See this as a second chance. You're wife's gone.'
I fucking hate my (after-)life. Why me? Here I sit beside her dead body, talking with god. Grief will come later. But as he said, given that I'm supposed to be dead, too, there's not much I can do, really.
Dragon Age Inquisition Romance
'Rules of engagement, sir?' I asked in surrender.
'Mess with a timeline of your choice as much as you like. As your wife is dead, you aren't breaking any vows if you take a lover… Yes, I said lover. I give you a carte blanche for non-marital sex. But keep it reasonable. And no hookers. One-night-stands are frowned upon. Don't go on a rampage against innocents. But in general, you now have a divine license to kiss and kill. Just not both at the same time, please. Good morals are very nice, but exceptions should stay that, exceptions. Do you have a specific alternate universe in mind?'
My mind raced in overdrive as I realized what big opportunity this was for me. All the fan fictions I had read… I'll so go into a game! And I know where I'll be, I know what will happen… 'I take it you will watch closely?' As he nodded, I continued. 'So there's a bit of entertainment involved?' Another nod, more hesitant this time. 'May I ask for a few boons to make it easier, then?'
Now it was God's turn to eye me suspiciously. 'What do you have in mind?'
All Dragons Dragon Age Inquisition
I shrugged. 'You know, useful skills…'
'First tell me which universe you choose. I see now that you're more devious than I thought.'
There are only two universes I still seriously consider. Mass Effect and Dragon Age. But I never liked guns. And the characters are much more likeable in the latter. So be it.
Dragon Age Inquisition Maps
'The Dragon Age Universe. If necessary, you could always slip in the role of a supporting character, like the Maker or so. No Credits guaranteed, though.' I added with a smirk.
I was surprised that I could make jokes in this situation. Guess that could be called gallow's humor. Oh god, I'm starting to make the same bad puns as God. Is that what is meant by punishment?
God now grinned widely. 'You do know that I can read thoughts, right?' I turned bright red. 'But yeah, that's doable. What do you need?'
'For starters, a little sword knowledge could come in handy… and a bit of divine intervention when it comes to luck. Like surviving against all odds and stuff.'
Dragon Age Inquisition Fighting Dragons
'Well, well, you do know how to ask for the good meat.' He pondered a bit, but agreed, in the end, to both.
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'And one more thing… could I please finally say goodbye to Alison?'
God shook his head. 'I'm sorry. Sometimes, our most loved ones get ripped suddenly from our lives for no reason.' he explained solemnly and with genuine sadness. 'You're the exception to be brought back. Not many before you have been granted a second chance. There's nothing I can do for her anymore, though. The only solace I can offer you for now is that she is really dead. No hell, no agony, just.. sleep would be an appropriate metaphor. She won't hear you anyway, but go ahead. You will need the closure. In order to succeed, you will have to accept your fate. In order to fly, you'll have to fall down the ledge first.'
I lowered my head in defeat. There wasn't much I would have to say to a dead body. Goodbye, my love. I kissed her already colder forehead and closed the lids over her hazel eyes.
I met his gaze again and took a deep breath. 'I'm ready.'
Sooo… what do you think? I hope this chapter has shown a bit where the story will go. Lots of humor (not always funny), a few unhappy moments, a good pinch of steamy stuff… But no regular updates. I will brush over DA:O before jumping right to DA2. What do youwant to read in this story? I'm always open for suggestions. And beta readers.
UPDATE: As it has led to confusion as to why I wrote this steamy scene, I want to clear that up. Ironically, it is the product of a lost bet. The winner of our little bet could demand a chapter to be written after his/her wishes. I lost, and she wished for a funny sex scene. Seriously, who does that? Anyhow, consider my debt paid, you slave driver! Indian casino near williams ca. :D
UPDATE #2: Apparently, the original scene was too steamy for this site, so I'm sorry if you reread this and miss the awesomeness. If you desperately need it.. there are other sites for that craving. Pervs.
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A Dragon in the Inquisition by Matman0187
Fandoms:Dragon Age: Inquisition, Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim
04 Aug 2017
Tags
Summary
It has been 5 years since the mishap with the Elder Scroll sent the Dragonborn to this new world. 5 long years since he'd seen his homeland of Tamriel. The magic of the scroll transported him to a new world, in some ways similar to his home, but in others, so very different. This new realm of Thedas was full new mysteries and dangers, and a long history of conflict. Every desperate attempt to return home ended in failure, and the Dragonborn finally resigned himself to his fate of being stuck here forever. But then Kirkwall's Chantry was destroyed, the Circles of Magi fell apart, and the Mage Rebellion began.
As the war was quickly going nowhere for either side, and the bodies began to pile up, the Divine called together a conclave at the Temple of Sacred Ashes, the most holy of places for the religion of the Maker. For some reason he did not understand, the Dragonborn decided to attend this conclave, believing the reason behind his presence in Thedas was soon to be revealed.
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- Part 1 of Dragonborn Duronius
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